If I Was Beyonce...

I'd shut my big fat cake hole

I'm really getting sick of the double-standard sexist bullshit in modern British society. Beyonce's song "If I Were A Boy" makes incredibly sexist generalisations about how all men neglect women and that they lack any kind of emotional depth because after all they are "just a boy".

If Eminem released a song making offensive generalisations about women there would be no end of complaints. He certainly wouldn't be allowed to promote it on the BBC "Six O'Clock News" and "Strictly Come Dancing".

All my life I've had to put up with women whining about sexism and I've had enough of it. SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!

All men are potential rapists

Technically accurate (You can commit rape without using a penis so impotence or paralysis is no excuse) but then on the same note:

All women are potential whores

You don't hear that one said very often do you?

Having been an attentive, caring husband who didn't take his wife for granted but is about to go through a divorce I don't like having to hear that song that tells me I'm automatically scum because I'm male. Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross have been censured so the BBC should follow suit with Beyonce.

And then I read crap like this on the internet. Tell me Jacqui Smith, have you ever heard of a Gigolo? Women have encounters with prostitutes too but it's far easier to portray all men as sexual predators who'd happily rape an enslaved child as it helps you push your "Stand up for wimmin" agenda which in turn promotes your own career and covers up the fact that like Harriet Harman you are a piss poor politician.

Then there's the gender pay gap. My boss is a woman, her boss is a woman, they both earn more money than me. Why do I need to be legislated against?

The "glass ceiling" doesn't just stop women from getting into top positions, it stops men who aren't from the "Old boys" network too. It's nothing to do with sexism and everything to do with keeping "the right sort" in charge - who're normally thick as shit (Piers Moron anybody?)

The main reason women (on average) earn less money than men (on average) is because of the career choices they make (on average). Few women work in my profession (I.T.) but those that do have the same career opportunities as the men.

Domestic violence is another example of modern sexism. Just this Friday I was asked if I wanted to make a donation to Amnesty International specifically to protect women who suffer domestic abuse. No mention of men that suffer domestic abuse.

It is estimated that 1 in 4 women and 1 in 6 men are a victim of domestic abuse. However those that do the estimating believe the figure for men is in fact higher as most men feel too ashamed to come forward.

Hardly surprising when you consider the public mockery that the "Mitchell Brothers" got when it turned out their real life partners had been smacking them about. I don't see what either of them could have done differently. If they'd retaliated then they would've been portrayed as "wife beaters" and it would have damaged their careers.

Then there's the farce that is the british child custody system. If this story in the Sun is to be believed then either Baby P's father is the biggest scumlord in Northern London or there is institutional sexism in child custody.

Even when the mother was denied care of Baby P, he was given to her 23 year old friend who had no parenting experience in preference to the father.

All I know about him is that he was married to her and she kicked him out. So what could make him such an appalling father for him to not get custody?

The fact of the matter is that custody is automatically given to the mother. A mothers rights are paramount, fuck the rights of the child and the father.

The mother can kick the father out, have full custody of the child, bring someone else in and claim maintenance off the father. How is that fair?

Whatsmore the courts are lousy at ensuring fathers are given access to their children or any control in their upbringing.

Thankfully to support this injustice there is another sexist generalisation in society where it is accepted that all broken families are as a result of the father abandoning the children and not paying towards their upbringing.
Whilst I accept that this does happen, it is far from the norm yet "wimmin" activists are free to spread this bullshit generalisation in the national media to protect sexist child custody procedures.

As far as I'm concerned the custody rules can be sorted out with one simple rule:

No Stay? No Pay

If the parent without custody isn't getting their court-agreed access then they don't pay maintenance until the access is restored. This works vice-versa.

To give you an idea of how much sexist crap I've had to put up with in my "modern" upbringing, here's a poem I was taught at Primary School:

What are little boys made of?

Slugs and snails and puppy dogs tails

What are little girls made of?

Sugar and spice and all things nice